Thursday, December 31, 2009

The Fail Intern

Once upon a time there was an intern called Lily.  She worked full time for a junior executive at a movie studio.  Lily was slightly arrogant and possibly the most socially awkward intern that the studio had ever had.  Although her title was 'intern' she worked every day and took care of all the duties that a regular full-time assistant would.  She didn't know it, but all the other assistants could not stand Lily's arrogance and conversation-stopping, mind-bogglingly-strange comments.

On her last day of interning, Lily decided that it would be a good idea to print out all the CONFIDENTIAL scripts that she was not meant to have access to, as well as private lists that belonged to other executives.  With her luck, one of the assistants on the floor discovered what she was up to and reported it to her boss, who in turn was fuming with anger and demanded that Lily go home and bring back everything she had printed over the last few months, immediately! Lily, not being the sharpest tool in the box, didn't deny having taken material home previously and instead drove home and did exactly as she was told.   In her panic, she tried approaching all the other assistants for guidance as to how to handle the situation with her boss, in hopes to get a recommendation from her for future employment.  You see, Lily knew that Hollywood is a small town, and that she could not afford to burn such a well connected bridge.  All the assistants repeated the same advice:  to go home and to give her boss some time to breathe, then send an apology card and a token of good will.

Lily obviously knew better...NOT!  Just before midnight on the first Saturday after her last day, she showed up with her mother at the personal residence of the executive she had worked for.  FAIL.  Her mother was crying to the executive and attempted to apologize for Lily's unprofessional behavior!  The executive was creeped out (to say the least) and reported the visit to HR and the presidents of the studio.  You can be sure that the executive will never recommend Lily for any position in any industry, EVER!
Lily is most definitely a FAIL Intern!

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