Ophelia, karma is a bitch and that ex-boss should watch Devil Wears Prada! And remember, she who laughs last laughs longest!
Did I ever tell you guys how I got my latest gig? OMG, the interview was a bloody nightmare. I wore an adorable black dress with a smart red blazer (Ophelia, you would have been proud!). Little did I know that I would be made to sit on an incredibly low couch! I mean I was basically sitting on the floor. Well, seeing as the dress was almost down to my knees, I had decided the morning of to only shave from my knees down (as most women do!). BIG MISTAKE! By having me sit on this low couch I swear the assistant that interviewed me could basically see my crotch! I wanted to dig a hole and crawl into it. I was mortified.
Then she began to ask me the questions that I dread the most:
"tell me about a time when you were faced with a difficult decision and how you went about it"
"tell me about a time when you had a million and one things to get done and how you performed under pressure"
"tell me about a time when.... F*** OFF!"
Seriously, I was ready to punch the girl in the face if she uttered the words tell me about a time when again! Plus I was paranoid about the fact that she was staring at the fuzz that I had left on my thighs. How the hell was I to anticipate any of this?
Well, as luck should have it, I got the job and on my first day I totally cracked a joke about the disastrous interview and she barely even remembered any of it. To think that one of the most horrifying experiences in my life was just another routine moment in hers!